An Interviewer once asked me, "What is your worst trait?" Without a blink of an eye, I answered "I am perfectionist." For some people, this may sound a good characteristic, however, I think there is a hairline delineation between competing with one self and being defeated by your own self. Before, competing with myself has helped me achieved my goals. Down the road, however, I lost the drive and my passion dwindled, my self esteem went elsewhere and I found myself developing the worst traits anyone can have. I have the worst temper in my honest opinion. I can raise hell and beyond if you trigger my anger. I get irritated at the slightest annoyance you could ever think of. The worst habit I have developed is worrying. I have learned the art of worrying at full length of 12 hours a day to which my psoriasis flare up can be highly attributed.
This year, I became honest with myself and with God. I have finally admitted to myself that there is something wrong with me. I laid down my "perfect me" cloak and surrendered to God's glory. Everyday is still a struggle for me. Every morning, I try to clear my mind and pray for God's strength and guidance to keep me positive throughout the day, to keep me from being impulsive and uncontrollable when stressful situations sets in. I am writing this post to tell my readers that makeup can never change you. It can not make you beautiful unless you feel beautiful within. I can attest that I was 20 pounds heavier now but I extremely feel lighter within. I can smile even at a stressful situation. I can now somehow maneuver my emotions to tilt to the positive side when things go wrong. All with God's help. So here are a few tips on how to have a new you (ohh let's not go into the weight loss challenge or hair style eh?):
- Be honest with yourself. It took me years to realize that faking a smile is harder than crying your heart out when everything's not going your way. If you have issues with yourself, like you have a quick temper or you worry a lot, CONFRONT them now. These self defeating attitudes can break you more than the challenges in your life.
- Surround yourself with friends or people that can help you change. Let go of the people that feeds your soul with negativity, people who would love to see you fall down than rise up. Life is too short to keep you baggage too heavy.
- Educate yourself. Read books or go to retreats. I am currently back to reading books. I have lost my interest in reading when I went to lawschool. Would you believe that the last book I finished was the Harry Potter series? hahaha I am reading this two motivational books I found in National Bookstore. I just want to share a trivia that I have read in Harold Sala's book. Did you know that "Fear not" is mentioned 365 times in the Bible. Now, you've got one for each day of the year to keep yourself from fearing or worrying.
- Do not get frustrated. Defeating your worst traits/habits can't be done overnight. It needs lots of patience and prayer.
- Finally, expose yourself to challenging situations. If you are the type of person that wants everyday to be a happy ending, then you are living in the wrong world. Everyday ain't gonne be YOUR day, that's a reality we all have to face. There will be tough times ahead. These cirscumstances can either bring out the best or the worst in you. Exposing yourself to different situations can test your patience or your positivity. Just imagine that it is an immunization vaccine. You'll know that you outgrew your old self when you are faced with same kind of problems but you approach them in a better tune. If you have the same problem and the same attitude that means you flunk the test. Well, you could always go back to square one, right?
This may not be your usual beauty related post but you should always remember, having a beautiful heart and an open mind is better than having a 6 packs abs and a fair skin. :)
Godbless everyone!!!
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